I don’t struggle with porn. It’s not a temptation for me in the slightest. But, last night I got to listen to a young man share with a group of his peers about how he has been struggling with watching porn for a few years. He’s a teenage boy and the draw has been altering his life from all it could be. It’s been affecting his walk with the Lord. It’s been affecting his schoolwork in an unproductive way and it’s been lowering his self-esteem. It’s been distancing him from his friends and putting a wall between him and his small group at his church.
Now, for anyone who is asking, “Where are the parents?”
I’m right here.
Last night my son, a handsome 16-year-old with dark eyes and broad shoulders, shared about how he has been struggling with his own “addiction”. It had started as curiosity and it grew to become a controlling force in his nights; the cycle of feeling guilt and remorse and distant from God and from family continued to drive him to the porn to fill that hole. The enemy was building a fortress in my son’s life and using a terrible Giant to keep pushing my son down. The silence and the lies were the chains that were holding my son captive and weighing him down.
When he was asked to share his testimony in front of his youth group, I told him to be honest. I told him that he had to be completely transparent no matter how much he might fear that others would judge him. I believe that when we are transparent with our struggles miraculous things happen. The times that I have been transparent are the times that I have had women come to me in private and say, “Hey, I did that!” or “I feel that way, too!”
And so, my brave son, stood up in front of this large group of people—the teenage girls whose mysterious ways magnetize him, the close friends with whom he sarcastically spars, the young adult men whose approval he longs for and...his parents—and he began to slay this Giant.
He broke the silence which is the beginning of overcoming and breaking any stronghold that the enemy may have on us. As long as what we do, we keep a secret, it will have some form of control over us. And, so today, I am once again in awe of our God who gives out His grace so freely—both to myself and to my son. I know better now how to pray for him. I know better how to encourage him.
While I was reading my bible this morning I came across this verse in 1 Samuel:
“You are not able to go out against this Philistine and fight him; you are only a boy, and he has been a fighting man from his youth.”
And, I imagined my 16-year-old standing in front of this big porn industry with a stone and a slingshot. I could see him hurling the stone at the lights and the lies of an industry that destroys the lives of men and women—young an old. I saw him attack this Giant with a newfound courage because he had the support of amazing Youth Pastors and leaders who live their lives purposefully so that teenagers don't have to be alone as they search for the stones to throw at the Giants. In my mind I could hear the crowd cheer as the Giant fell to the ground and the sound was so similar to applause that I had heard last night when he had finished sharing his journey. I closed my eyes and treasured this moment with pride knowing my son will walk taller today.
